The problem however is that he never does. He is an overweight nerd who oddly enough bullies her in the relationship because she has low self esteem and doesn't seem to realize she can:
- Stand up for herself.
- Dump him whenever she wants.
- Find someone nicer.
But because she has low self esteem, she keeps waiting and waiting. Hoping someday he will marry her.
Except here is the thing...
If he hasn't married you by now, he isn't going to.
So simple.
I would set the limit at 4 years.
If you are dating a man for 4 years and he never discusses marriage / pops the question during those 4 years, then he has no intention of ever getting married. Definitely not to you.
Four years is more than enough time for a man to realize he loves you and he wants to marry you. If he doesn't propose and set a date for the wedding, then he doesn't want to marry you.
Waiting 5, 6, 7 or more years? Pff. He just likes having you around because you are his friend with benefits. He doesn't want to marry you, he just wants the perks of free sex / being your friend.
So if you are nearing the 4 year mark you need to ask yourself the following questions?
Is the romance in your relationship dead?
Is he refusing to get married?
Is he just taking advantage of you?
If you answered Yes to 1 or more of the above, you should consider dumping him immediately.
If you answered Yes to 2 or 3 of the above, you should IMMEDIATELY dump him.
If you answered No to all three questions, and if you are nearing the 4 year mark, then stop wasting time and you should propose marriage to him.
Just propose to him. Get it over with. Propose. Who cares about tradition. Just do it.
If he refuses, pretend like everything is normal for 1 week to see if he changes his mind.
Then dump him if he still hasn't softened on the idea of marriage. If he loves you, he should want to marry you.
Maybe after he has been without you for awhile he will change his mind and realize he now wants to marry you, but you might have to go through this painful process to get him to that realization.
If he doesn't change his mind and want to marry you, start dating someone else. Find someone you love who is marriage material. Don't waste your time with playboys who just want hanky panky with no commitment.
