Why Women need to be Afraid of Creepy Incel Losers more than Ever

By Monique Bellamont - April 2018.

In the wake of the Toronto Van Attack and the Incel*'s victims - 10 dead and another 15 people injured, women need to understand that there is a reason why they should follow their gut instinct and avoid the creepy losers they sometimes meet on first dates.

See Also Why Some Incels are Celebrating the Toronto Van Attack

* Incel = Involuntary Celibate. A male virgin who blames women for the fact that they are a virgin and is violently angry about it, when in reality they are a virgin because they are creepy losers.

The Creep Factor = Dealbreaker

When meeting a new guy for the first time many women (dare I say all women?) have to assess whether this guy is a creepy nutcase who might try to murder us, stalk us, abduct us and keep us in a basement replaying their favourite scene from Silence of the Lambs.

Not to make light of the situation, but lets face it: There are some creepy scary men out there who reek of desperation and the potential to be violent. Are they all violent? No, absolutely not. But everyone (men and women) has the potential to be violent. Some people are simply more violent and creepy than other people.

And that is what the woman's instincts are looking for on these first dates. Is this guy a creepy violent lunatic? And is he actually marriageable material worthy of meeting my parents?

Are Incels really losers?

Well if we want to use sports analogies, here goes:

The Winners are typically the masculine jocks who win the football game and date a cheerleader.

The Losers are not masculine, not "Alpha Males", and they are certainly not winning at football or any other sports. And only in their dreams are they dating a cheerleader.

This doesn't mean Incels cannot be financially successful. Rather what Incels are bad at is being social with the opposite sex in a manner which is not creepy. They are socially awkward around women, don't really know how to talk to women in a manner which is not creepy, make weird jokes that don't go over that well, and generally frighten all the women away.

In the dating world, Incels are basically at the bottom of the pecking order, with the jocks and alpha males way up at the top, and the Incels are down in the gutters.

So it is no wonder Incels are bitter about it. They are sexually repressed, socially inept, scare all the women away, and have zero clue about what their real problem is and instead blame all their problems on women.

So yes, Incels are definitely losers.

Are Incels Misogynists?

Yes. Incels hate women. That is the very definition of misogyny.

They are also anti-feminists, anti-social and have a host of other problems. Mental issues? Maybe. Mental hangups? Definitely. Slight difference between the two.

Incels are also often internet trolls playing out their creepy fantasies on websites like 4chan - which is home to many different subculture groups which are similarly creepy and violent.

Incel Terminology

Incels hate the whole dating world. They cannot compete with the alpha males and have regressed to internet groups where they talk to other Incels, celebrate their misogyny and complain about women all the time. Incels even have a name for these women:

Stacy - A woman who pretends to be all innocent but whenever she meets a Chad she suddenly becomes interested in sex.

Chad - An alpha male or a winner, a man worthy of actually having sex with. Even Beta males qualify as Chads, because even though they are lower in the pecking order, they are still higher than the loser virgin Incels at the bottom.

The Incel Rebellion - Some Incels have been pushing the idea that they should all rise up and kill the Chads and Stacys of the world. That is how bitter and violent these people are.

Alek Minassian - The creepy loser from Toronto who killed 10 people and injured 15 trying to start an Incel Rebellion.

Elliot Rodger - The creepy loser from Santa Barbara who killed 6 people and injured 14 back in 2014, also trying to start an Incel Rebellion and inspired Alek Minassian.

The École Polytechnique Murderer, aka Marc Lépine - Killed 14 people and injured 14 others at the
École Polytechnique in Montreal in 1989. He blamed women for himself not getting into the school's engineering program. He claimed he was "fighting feminism".

Why Incels need to Get A Life

There is actually a cure for men who are Incels.

It is called going outside and Get A Life. These losers have spent too much time focused on trying to get laid, venting their frustrations on the internet (4chan and other misogynistic websites) and surrounded by other men who are just an echo chamber for their own worst ideas.

They need to go outside, find a hobby, lets say for example "Birdwatching" and just focus on that hobby for months or years.

And while they are doing all this Birdwatching (aka Birding) they should learn how to socialize with other birdwatchers (including women) without being a creepy loser.

Then after years of socializing and not creeping women out, maybe then they might meet a woman who is also into Birdwatching who finds him attractive and not creepy at all.

And obviously it doesn't have to be Birdwatching.

I recommend staying away from the more violent hobbies like hunting or kickboxing, because that is actually more likely to just add to the Creep Factor. It could be any number of non-violent hobbies.

• Fishing
• Canoeing
• Exercising
• Walking the Dog
• Catching Butterflies
• Beekeeping
• Non-Profit Volunteer
• Etc

So essentially there is a cure, but it requires the man - the Incel - to recognize that they are their own worst enemy when it comes to socializing with women. They need to get outside, exercise, find a hobby, and become a new better person.

Or they could just stay a creepy loser Incel. It is their choice after all.

Augmented Reality Speed Dating Platform

By Rob C.

Inspired by the November 15th 2016, AMA Toronto panel discussion entitled The Future Today: How Marketers Can Leverage Emerging Technologies, I would like to present my ideas on the components necessary in creating a functional AR speed dating solution.

AR = Augmented Reality. If you have already played Pokemon Go, you know how that works. If you have not then check out the short film below, "Sight", which shows what some theorize the future of Augmented Reality might look like.




 

Regarding the AMA Event – held at 345 Adelaide St W after work;  I was impressed by the people I met there and the synergistic ideas in the room regarding overcoming the challenge of getting adopters and making mavens for phone apps and other bits of innovative technology. A top Toronto B2B marketing consultant Tania Stadnik organized the event and introduced the speakers. Personally I was more stimulated by all the hip Toronto event bloggers in the audience, (Shanny, Raymi and Wedding Girl) than I was with the three well know ‘thought leaders’' on stage, Adam Green from Google Canada, Zahra Rajani the VP Digital Experience at Jackman Reinvents, and Kevin Keane from Brainsights.  They're okay but I don't read their stuff the same way I soak up the girl's blogs - but that's me.

In the hour long talk that followed these marketing idealists discussed the many distracting elements of technology which discourage people from adopting new systems and practices that could be very beneficial to their organization. In the hierarchy of change management there are early adopters and mavens at the top and and the slow pokes at the bottom who are still using their blackberries. The secret is to find managers in between that have shared goals and to remove roadblocks at all levels of the enterprise. And of course, the unspoken truth is that the application itself must have a dead simple interface and be easy to use and understand and be immediately rewarding to the user.

Augmented Reality Dating Programs need Facebook API

We here at True Love Bites we been wrapping our brains around how to launch this city’s first augmented reality singles event after seeing the short film, "Sight" ensconced on Laura Bilotta’s Single in the City blog about augmented reality dating and reading there about the call for developers to make apps for the new device.  We have concluded that in order to get any details worth reporting in a wingman app of any description, the software would have to access the massive database of personal information stored at Facebook, failing that Twitter, and after that Instagram.

The short film Sight was created by students Eran May-raz and Daniel Lazo at the Bezalel Academy of Art and Design, the film explores the potentials and hazards of Augmented Reality ‘wingman’ apps. But the amount of data that a male user is seeing could only come from a sophisticated social network like Facebook – no dating profile user is going to put that much information about themselves in a dating profile.

An AR enabled speed dating event however encourages everyone to participate in the tech exercise. Sure there’s the usual wine and cheese and the usual long table with men on one side and women on the other, but this speed dating event is very different. Our Meetup is a smart phone powered free WiFi enabled occasion; app users also need to enable the audio speaker function and share a headset – cool huh? Like the two dogs in the Disney movie Lady and the Tramp eating the spaghetti. 

Everyone’s smart phone must download the AR app, they then sign in using their Facebook profile, which will then comb through their Facebook profiles for mutual interests. So when the app users meet the program will use audio (voice track) to help them more meaningfully explore their commonalities in the few minutes they have together.

Which oddly enough is a bit like Facebook stalking each other at the same time, in person. Whatever.

So let’s walk through this…  At the AR speed dating event, using the technology, the two app users would meet for the first time and rather than exchange pleasantries about their jobs and lives and career aspirations etc. all these boring details, private details, the app would instead remind them both of a café in a remote city where they both ate once, years apart (as per Facebook), and ask them to recall the best thing on the menu, or anything they can remember about the place. In this way, their true personalities are more easily discovered and the exchange is altogether more meaningful. 

The program would also streamline the path for follow-up encounters by suggesting ‘equal distance’ restaurants or other suitable meeting places (maybe some sponsorship opportunities here) and just as it paved the path to friendship, it’s a safe perishable conduit that’s easily terminated by one or the other party if they do not like each other after their first date.

It’s a far cry from what’s possible with the contact lens powered equipment seen in the short film "Sight", but its safer too – it’s a simple Facebook API powered AR solution.  Developers? Are you working on this? Please comment below if you have ideas about creating a dating AR interface.

Politics, Love, Trumpites and Dealbreakers

So... Donald Trump is the president elect.

Now imagine going on a first date with a Trumpite (Trump supporter) and not knowing that they are a Trump supporter when you agreed to the first date on POF, OKCupid or whatever personals website you use.

Depending on your political leanings, someone being a Trump supporter might be a Dealbreaker for you. (Dealbreakers are things you learn about a potential mate that cause you to want to dump them immediately. After all if you spot something wrong with them that will ultimately ruin the relationship, don't you owe it to yourself - and them - to break it off immediately?)

Or maybe you really love Trump (which makes you a Trumpite) and dating a fellow Trumpite sounds like an exciting prospect to you. And dating a Hillary supporter or any other sane person messes with your insane-Trump-loving brain.

Thus there a number of things people should check before they even go on a first date.

Possible Dealbreakers

#1. Are they a Trumpite?

#2. Are they a smoker?

#3. Are they an alcoholic or a drug addict?

#4. Do they support a woman's right to choose?

#5. Are they an omnivore? (Because dating a vegan can sometimes be a dealbreaker, while some vegans refuse to date omnivores.)

#6. Are they poor? (For golddiggers, this can be a dealbreaker if they only want to marry a rich person.)

#7. Are they gainfully employed? (For people who want to avoid golddiggers, this can be a dealbreaker if the other person doesn't even have a job.)

#8. Do they have any STDs? (Seriously, people need to be more upfront about this.)

#9. Are they a racist bigot / anti-semite / sexist pig? (Although the difference between this and a Trumpite is very little.)

#10. Are they just really stupid and stupid people annoy you? (Again, Trumpites...)



In other news, here are some amusing Trump memes.

Five Tips for Restaurant Dates

Tip #1. Never take your date to a fast food restaurant where there is a high chance the staff spit on the food. The only saliva in your date's mouth should be yours and theirs. Find a place more upscale where you are expected to tip the waiter.

Tip #2. On a first date men and women should do two things:

(1) Split the bill at the restaurant; (Arguably the best way to split the bill is to bring cash, although some people prefer debit or credit. Bring both.)

(2) Understand that if a man pays for everything and then expects a woman to automatically have sex with him, that basically makes her a prostitute. By splitting the bill (going Dutch) it also makes it clear the woman is interested in the man, and not in his money. If the man pays for everything and becomes really pushy about having sex, that coerciveness technically makes any sex that follows to legally count as "date rape". Smart women pay half. Smart men who want to be loved for being themselves, and not resort to paying for sex / date rape, should also pay half. And if a woman doesn't like it when a man wants to go Dutch, that woman is a golddigger and not worth dating.

Traditionalists may not want to hear these things, but hey date rape, prostitution, and golddiggers are all very traditional.

Tip #3. Chivalry isn't dead. Pull out the chair for the lady and help her out of her jacket. Chivalry is one tradition worth keeping.

Tip #4. Tip the waiter. Even if the service was bad.

10% for bad service.
15% for good service.

Tip #5. Polite dinner conversation. There are certain topics you should never discuss at a restaurant while on a date. Politics, religion, abortion, alien conspiracy theories, dead animals, murder, etc. If those topics come up by accident don't avoid the topic, but steer the conversation elsewhere.

Attractiveness, Kissing and Oral Health

First let us start with an image on how to kiss with braces... the answer? French kissing and use lots of tongue. Avoid having the teeth even near each other.

Otherwise the next step is to talk about oral health.

Seriously, would you date someone who has bad teeth? Would you kiss someone who has teeth that look like they were a chain smoker who never brushed their teeth EVER???

I call it the Bad Teeth Bogus Photo Problem. They look fine in their photos on the personals website, but when you meet them in person you discover they never showed their teeth in any of the photos online. It is just as bad as people who photoshop their images or people who use old photos of themselves from 10+ years ago.

Be honest, if you're like me then you'd probably look at their teeth and then start looking for a way to get away from them. ("So... do you like Hannibal Lecter? Because I love Silence of the Lambs and all those movies. Serial killers are awesome." That should scare them away quickly.)

And then there is the matter that bad teeth is a strong indicator that the person has problems with cleaning and doing chores. After all, if they cannot be bothered to brush their teeth regularly how often do they shower, take out the garbage, vacuum the floors, do their laundry, exercise, etc. People who are lazy about their teeth are often lazy about other factors in their life - which makes them poor choices when you are looking for a long term partner.

So what can you do to improve the quality of your teeth? Well the following page: Oral Health connected to Overall Health gives a list of 12 things to do to improve your teeth.

#1. Brush 2 to 3 times daily.

#2. Floss daily.

#3. Eat healthier meals that contain less sugar.

#4. Eat healthier snacks in-between meals.

#5. Rinse out your mouth regularly with anti-bacterial mouthwash.

#6. Chew sugar-free gum (removes bacteria from your mouth).

#7. If you are a smoker, stop smoking.

#8. Replace your toothbrush every 3 to 4 months.

#9. Schedule dental checkups regularly.

#10. Find a dentist you actually LIKE (this improves your odds of going there).

#11. Contact your dentist immediately if you have an oral health emergency. Don't delay and wait for it to get worse.

#12. If you don't have dental insurance from your workplace, look into getting dental insurance.

The above mentioned page mentions Archer Dental, a local Toronto dentist which has two locations in Rosedale and Runnymede - was voted the Best Dentist in 2013 by NOW Magazine, has 4 stars on Yelp, and is listed as The Best Dentist in Toronto by Product Reviews Canada. So if you're looking for a good dentist, start with the best.

After all when it comes to first dates and first kisses, attractiveness and nice teeth really are important. Why not put your best effort into keeping your teeth healthy and attractive?

The Instant Connection

If you've experienced what it is like to meet someone and have an instant connection (sometimes known as love at first sight) then you will understand that sometimes people also get impatient and kiss on that first date.

Recently I read an article titled "Is it wrong to kiss on the first date?" in which the author claimed she followed two rules:

#1. She doesn't kiss until at least the third date.

#2. She doesn't have sex until the 6th or 7th date (depending on comfort level).

To which I responded to by thinking about every long term relationship I have ever had and have since concluded the person who wrote the above mentioned article has a very different set of rules.

1997-1998 - Kissed on the first date.

1999-2000 - Kissed on the first date.

2000 - Kissed on the second date.

2001 - Kissed on the first date.

2001-2003 - Kissed on the first date.

2003-2009 - Kissed on the first date.

2010-2011 - Kissed on the first date.

2011-2012 - Kissed on the first date.

2013-Present - Kissed on the first date.
I don't kiss and tell so I will also just vaguely say that more than 1 of these long term relationships involved some sort of sexual activity (light petting or more) on the first date or within the first 3 dates.

You may notice also that in 2000 I had one date where we kissed on the second date instead of the first. That relationship only lasted 5 months and was comparatively short as long term relationships go. (Maybe it should be classified as a mid term relationship?)

You may recall I even wrote an article awhile back on the topic of Three Dates Equals Sex. Which basically goes to the concept that if you haven't had sex by the 3rd date, then the other person will probably get bored of you because they are not feeling a connection.

People want that Instant Connection. They want Love at First Sight or whatever you want to call it.

It has been my experience that relationships that last only 1 or 2 dates have little or no physical or emotional attachment to go with them. People get bored of the other person because they aren't getting that Instant Connection / Love at First Sight feeling.

That said however, I should point out that you should ONLY kiss someone during a first date if you are actually getting that feeling.

And if you still are not getting that feeling by the 2nd date, it is time to let the other person know you just aren't feeling it for them. If you are certain it will never happen after the first date, let them know immediately. No point wasting their time / hurting their feelings.

And don't be a jerk and just plain avoid them. Refusing to answer emails, texts or phone calls is just lame and shows you have a complete lack of empathy for other people. It is cold and heartless.

Tell them you are not interested in a 2nd date, let them down easy and wish them best of luck.

"Sorry I am not interested in a 2nd date. I wish you best of luck however." Easy. Short enough to go in a text message if you are too cowardly to tell them any other way.

Do's and Don'ts of Dating Vegans and Vegetarians

So... You're dating a vegetarian or vegan eh? Well here are some handy do's and don'ts for making your relationship go smoothly.

Do take your date out to various vegan / vegetarian restaurants on a regular basis. So for example if they're a raw vegan, take them out to a raw vegan restaurant like Rawlicious once in awhile.

Do not complain about the food when eating at a vegan / vegetarian restaurant. When in doubt, just order a smoothie.

Do make an effort to eat more vegetarian food when socializing with your date.

Do not start arguments by pointing out your date is wearing leather boots.

Do realize you will likely end up living in the Vegan Village in Toronto or some place similar if the two of you buy a house together.

Don't mock their food choices. Being a vegan or vegetarian is often an ethical decision for people and is practically their religion.

Do have picnics whenever the weather is good for it. Picnics can be a surprisingly frugal way of "dining out" together.

Don't make a big deal about things that are obviously an issue for them. Just stop worrying about it and be "easy going", "down to earth" and whatever other things you claimed to be in your personals profile.

Do avoid talking about food too much. Basically don't talk about it unless they bring up the topic.

Don't take them to a normal restaurant on a first date. Try to accommodate and show some interest in their food choices.

Do try to fall in love with them, not some idealized version of them.

The Coffee Date - Poetry by Maria Jones-Statham

The Coffee Date

I sit in the coffee shop and wait
Always waiting
I look at my watch
I look at it again 1 minute later

You're late

Is it because you didn't like my photo?
Maybe you thought I was ugly?
Or too tomboy-ish?

Wait, this is the right coffee shop?
There isn't another one across the street
Or around the corner...

My heart races as a man fitting your description enters
No wait, he is with someone
Minutes pass
I text a friend and keep looking at my watch

Finally there you are!
I can tell by your glasses and hair
You don't even notice me at first
I wave at you and you seem to look right through me...

For a moment I think I might be wrong
It isn't you...
Or maybe you will turn and leave
Pretend not to know me

But then you see me
Your eyes light up
I smile
You order a coffee and come over

You apologize for being late
I say it doesn't matter but inside my heart is twisted
You talk about the weather
You ask about my family
My work, my hobbies, my interests

Awkward silence and even more awkward conversation
You keep looking at your watch
I catch myself looking at mine

Well this was nice meeting you say
Yes, nice meeting you
My heart sinks like a rock in a bottomless pit

Would you like to meet again I blurt out
I will call you later you say

But you never call

And I really didn't expect you to I suppose

It is so hard to meet people

I go home and pet my pussy, literally and figuratively

Sometimes I wonder if I should stop meeting men
You know, buy a vibrator, get more cats, stop shaving my legs

But then I see the happy couples in public
Holding hands, kissing, touching

And I realize its not sex I am craving
Its companionship
The kind a cat or a dog could never give

So I go on Plenty of Fish and I see a new you
You seem nice...
Attractive, interesting hobbies...

We agree to meet
Coffee?
Sure, I love coffee

I sit in the coffee shop and wait
Always waiting
I look at my watch
I look at it again 1 minute later



By Maria Jones-Statham

March 2012

The Pre Date Phone Call - Screening your Dates Beforehand = Judgement Time

Ah, the good ol' pre date phone call.

Ever done this?

Basically the person you are planning to have a first date with wants to hear the sound of your voice and have a conversation to see if you are compatible.

For me this is a great way to weed out people I would find exceptionally annoying to talk to in real life.

I will cite a specific example here:

"Samantha" called me up while I was having a texting conversation with her. Apparently she was getting impatient and wanted to speak with me right away. I didn't even get to finish my text about zombies. Oh well.

During the ensuing phone conversation I began to notice a number of annoying traits about this woman.

#1. She got upset way too easily, over even minor things. (Which means it is really easy to push her buttons.)

#2. She came off as a bit of a braggart and egotistical - which is never a desirable trait. (I am not perfect either, but I do have a decent sense of humility.)

#3. My talkativeness made her anxious and annoyed - as did my apparent ability to guess what she was about to say next. (Honestly, I have gotten very good at guessing what people will say next. If that is my superpower it is apparently an annoying one.)

#4. My impression was that she was both a hypocrite and very judgmental, stating that she doesn't like judgmental people - and yet was being judgmental herself. When I pointed this out later on she got very upset. And when I explained that "Everyone is judgmental all the time. When you pick up a piece of cheese you are judging whether it is good to eat." she tried to argue that people aren't constantly judging everything they see, hear, smell, etc. At which point I explained yes they are. Because their brain interprets the data they receive from all the senses / etc and then makes a judgment call based on what it knows already. "This cheese smells like bad cheese. Time to throw it out because I think it has gone bad." The cheese has been judged. Even if the cheese smelled good then it would still get a judgment, but then it would be a positive one. "This cheese smells good. Time to make grilled cheese sandwiches!"

By the time I had determined #4 I knew this woman was not for me - in fact I daresay she is probably a mental headcase who is not ready to be dating anyone for a long term period.

How do I know this? Because the conversation was reminding me of an ex I had several years ago who was so judgmental and argumentative that I eventually broke up with and the reason I gave for the breakup was because I was extremely unhappy whenever I was with her.

I am serious, she was making me miserable because I couldn't have a normal conversation with her without her starting an argument. (So if I was already getting this from a mere 50 minute phone call then it was a pretty bad sign this woman was not for me.)

I think it might have something to do with my parents arguing a lot when I was a kid - argumentative people, the kind who deliberately argue for the sake of arguing, really grate on my nerves.

Which is why I contend that Samantha (and other extremely argumentative women like her) are not suitable for dating anyone. No one. Period.

Same goes with men who have the same sort of personality.

Now you might think "Oh but it takes two to tango. You can't have an argument if only one person is arguing."

Yes, you can. Both my parents have done it many times and I have personally witnessed it many times. It only takes one person to start an argument - and then just need to be in a deliberately argumentative mood.

As opposed to a person who is simply argumentative ALL THE TIME.

What it makes me realize is that there should almost be some kind of CONVERSATION ETIQUETTE that we can teach people in order to make them socialize better and lead them away from their argumentative tendencies.

For example things like "Don't bring up politics, religion or abortion."

However at the same time if those topics are such a big deal maybe it is better to get them out of the way in an hurry. Get it over and done with. Rip the bandaid off in one swift motion.

This is why "Judgement Time" (as I like to call it) or the "Pre Date Phone Call" is such an awesome way to screen potential dates.

Especially if you realize the person on the other end is an egotistical braggart / hypocrite and you start deliberately pressing their buttons.

Which I wholly admit to. Near the end of the call I was deliberately (but politely) pushing her buttons to make her realize what a hypocritical jackass she was.

I can be a jackass too, but at least I admit to it. It is the phonies that irritate me.

Being judgmental is NOT a bad thing. Making judgment calls about potential romantic partners just means you are trying to gauge people and then make a decision. There is nothing wrong with that.

However I will say that you should never judge too quickly. Wait and see first. When in doubt you should always try to test out whether the other person truly is the jackass you suspect them to be before giving them the proverbial boot.

Chewing Gum = Prepare to get Kissed

If a girl starts chewing gum near the end of a first date it means she is expecting the guy to kiss her.

It took me years to figure this one out so I am writing it down and passing on this bit of wisdom to you.

Which means, if you follow this logical reasoning that you can use chewing gum as a way to determine whether the girl wants to be kissed at the end of the date...

Here goes...

The date seems to be going well and it is near the end. The guy reaches into his pocket and offers the girl a piece of chewing gum. He then takes one for himself.

If the girl accepts the gum it means she is worried her breathe might smell bad and she has every intention of kissing you before the end of the first date.

If she refuses the gum... Yeah, your chances just dropped suddenly. Maybe she doesn't like gum, or doesn't like the flavour you offered her... so it is possible she still wants to kiss you, but the chances are likely that she won't since most women on a date are going to be self-conscious about possible bad breath.

If she takes out the gum first - and even offers you one - well that is a clear signal right there!

Note also that chewing gum also signals she may not just want a simple kiss on the lips - she is more likely to be wanting french kissing!

5 Tips to Become a Lady Magnet

Are you interested in attracting women like magnets in your singles life?

Have you ever wondered how Bad Boys manage to attract women so easily by behaving like jerks?

Its because women's brains are hard-wired to be attracted to Alpha-Males - and thus specific behaviour causes women to be instantly attracted to any man who exhibits Bad Boy / Alpha Male traits.

Here's how...

1: Never Settle for Just Any Woman

The biggest mistake you can possibly make in any relationship is to settle for whatever woman comes along for fear you can’t do any better than what you have! Doing this will prevent you from ever finding the woman you are truly meant to be with. It is difficult to take a leap of faith, especially in matters of the heart, but settling to be with a woman that doesn’t “do it for you” is a HUGE mistake…for you both! Do NOT settle for just any woman hold out for someone that you really connect with and live the life of your dreams! Believe it or not, women admire men who know what they want and won’t settle for anything less. It is a major turn on!

2: Apply the Laws of Attraction

This subject has been poked, prodded, turned upside down and inside out. It is contained within every magazine and book and research paper on the subject of love that you will ever run across. As a relationship expert myself, I have an entire wall of books dedicated to this subject alone, and more books and articles and theories are created every day around the globe on the differences between men and women regarding their particular triggers for attraction. It is right under your nose, every day, everywhere…on TV, out in public, you name the place…it’s right there staring you down! Yet unbelievably, there are STILL people who are completely clueless about the Laws of Attraction.
Now, this is not to say that the Laws of Attraction are good or right or even tolerable at times. But, there are certain inalienable truths about attraction that you need to know and understand if you desire to become successful in any romantic relationship.

What are the Laws of Attraction? Simply put, Men and Woman are polar opposites when it comes to attraction. Men initially feel sexual attraction based upon a woman’s physical appearance, which then leads them into a desire for a relationship. But, women are initially attracted to a man’s qualities. Sure, women will admire a man’s looks, but that doesn’t lead them into a desire for a relationship with him. It’s when a man exhibits confidence in his body language and communication–regardless of his looks–that women feel a powerful sexual attraction that over shadows the man’s physical attributes.

3: Don’t Be Too Nice

Of course, everyone knows that being “nice” is considered socially acceptable in the world. But, women do not choose a lover based upon how nice they may be – that’s how they choose their friends. Being “NICE” just isn’t what ignites the flames of passion. What does ignite the flames? Attraction. What is attractive? Confidence in one’s self! Use positive body language, take meaningful actions, and be your genuine self without regard to what others may think of you. This doesn’t mean you should act like a jerk, because no one likes a jerk either. It simply means that in order to attract a woman, you MUST be confident in yourself.

4: Convincing a Woman To Like You is a Big No-No!

Do not waste any of your valuable time trying to convince a woman that doesn’t appear interested in you romantically that you are the person they are meant to be with. It will NEVER work, and in fact, may backfire on you in a most embarrassing way. Why is this? Because you can’t change the way a person “feels.” You can try to understand and you can offer alternative points of view, but you cannot change their feelings. To make matters worse, when faced with the knowledge that a woman doesn’t “feel” attracted to them, some men often take ridiculous action to convince them otherwise-they will relentlessly pursue the woman without regard for her lack of “feelings.” Spare yourself this tragedy and move on to the next lady in line, who might just “feel” attracted to you-an absolute necessity to a fulfilling relationship!

 5: Seeking Her Approval is a Waste of Time

It is completely adverse to human nature for a woman to desire a man who seems to actively pursue her approval. Psychologically, it instills in a woman’s mind that the man is automatically not worthy of her attention, and no matter what you do to gain the woman’s approval…you will always be considered less than worthy. ALWAYS! The simple truth is that you will lack the necessary confidence in yourself in order to succeed in gaining the attraction you seek. Now, this does not mean you should completely ignore a woman’s approval-just that, instead, you need to gain it through self confidence. NOT by seeking her approval of you!

How to Fake It and get into their Pants

There are lots of books out there selling tricks designed to help men get into the pants of women.

Honestly, it largely comes down to acting sincere.

And sincerity is pretty hard for some men to master.

Basically it comes down to things like...

Looking into a woman's eyes and actually paying attention to what she is saying (instead of ogling her breasts).

Actually listening to what she is talking about and pretending to be interested.

Showing positive body language that shows you are interested in every word she says (instead of fidgeting with your cellphone, playing with your ring or hair, staring off into the distance...).

Make her the centre of your attention - not her body, but her mind first.

Be considerate and polite and show her that you are there for her and her alone. (And rescue kittens in trees, help elderly people across the street etc.)

Basically it is a long list of things like that designed to trick women into thinking this man is for real, he really does like her, that he really does care, listen, is kind, considerate, polite and the perfect man.

Taken all together and assuming she is the least bit attracted to the man, this combination of things will cause most women [by most I mean the vast majority of them, the exact percentage is unknown because it can't be scientifically proven] to be wanting to jump the poor guy before the date is over.

In contrast are much easier to seduce.

Or at least unmarried men. Married men and men who are in a committed loving relationship (practically married) are no doubt much harder because you also need to provide extreme temptation and assurance that they will not get caught.

Otherwise it is pretty simple because men are so simple.

#1. Flirt with him, show some cleavage, try to touch his arm or leg and he will get the hint.

#2. Suggest that the two of you go someplace private.

#3. If his blood is red and he doesn't have anything physically wrong with him he should be hot to trot and ready to ride.

In contrast there is no shortage of how to books on seduction of women - not because women are complicated, but because men are clueless.

What to talk about during a First Date

Number 10: Avoid talking about their past

Generally speaking, one should never ask about past lovers on a first date. In fact, this should be avoided until she initiates the topic (if she ever does). She might have been hurt or may still be in love with her ex. You also prefer to start with a clean slate, so becoming chummy with her and comforting her about past mistakes may not be the greatest strategy on the first date.

Number 9: Got any brothers or sisters?

Usually, a safe topic of conversation is asking about siblings (but don't ask her if she's got cute sisters). Asking about her parents could backfire if they divorced or separated, especially when she was very young. But sisters and brothers usually trigger good feelings and score points for you, since you're showing a caring side and an interest in her family life.

Number 8: Traveled anywhere special?

A tricky way to spark a girl's interest is by asking about her past travel destinations and where she intends on visiting in the future. The upside is that if she mentions a spot she always wanted to visit, lo and behold, here comes the knight in shining armor (that's you, boy) who offers to make her dreams come true one day by taking her there. This also provides each of you with some insight about the other's cultural background and openness to new adventures.

Number 7: Drinks, anyone?

A topic of conversation, especially if the date is taking place at a restaurant or bar, is the kind of food and drinks each of you prefers. Not only can you gauge whether or not you share culinary preferences, but the potential topics are endless and provide you with a safe topic of conversation -- unless, of course, you are dating someone with an addiction to food or alcohol.

Number 6: Any career plans?

Asking a girl about her past education and whether she intends on returning to school is admittedly a double-edged sword. She might love to go on and on about her numerous academic achievements, but she might break down and admit that her current job has absolutely nothing to do with what she studied. In either case, you are provided with a golden opportunity to reassure and encourage her with an abundance of compliments.

Number 5: How's your job?

If you are years removed from your college years, then talking about work and career goals just might be a safer topic. Admittedly, you shouldn't let her go into the mundane details about how fed up she is with her life, which would explain why she's on her seventh margarita. But generally speaking, people like to brag about work, no matter how routine it is. It also gives you an idea regarding whether or not you are dating a future CEO or a waitress for life (not that there is anything wrong with that, of course).

Number 4: Got any friends?

Ask her about her friends. Even if you do not know them, she will love to tell you about her circle of friends, how much they mean to her and where she met them (and all of the things they did together). Don't doze off, though, my good man; this is when you get precious details about her. If you ever make it further than the first date, her friends are usually the best source to unearth the skeletons in her closet.

Number 3: Free time frolicking

Does she Rollerblade, collect stamps or dance? How about sports? What kind of music does she like? These are the questions you must ask to determine how much of a bond exists between the two of you. Moreover, you gain some insight to follow-up questions.

Number 2: Weekend's peakin'

Not only do you get a clearer picture of what life with her will be like after the honeymoon, but you are also sending mixed messages, which is not entirely bad at first. Yes, mind games are childish, but keeping your cards at your chest gives you leverage. She will ask herself: "Does he want to see me on weekends?"

Number 1: Be bold and look ahead

Now, assuming she is having a good time and she is looking at you with that sparkle in her eye... in other words, if her body language is positive, you can look ahead and talk about other things you could do together in the future. Admittedly, you do not want to rush too far ahead and scare her off, but if she's enjoying herself, chances are she'll be curious to see what other great adventures you have in store for her.

Keep Talking!

How to Ask a Woman on a Date

You are smitten with an adorable woman and you want to ask her out on a date. Asking a woman to go out with you on a date could be really nerve-wracking because asking her out is an important moment in your life, this is the first step in dating and you want to do it right. Here are some tips to make things easier for you.

Confidence.

Of course when asking a woman to go out with you on a date, you need confidence to make it happen but it is best to remind you that having a beer or two to boost your confidence is not a good idea. Alcoholic drinks is not the answer, be naturally confident and learn to conquer your fears. Dress properly and appear with confidence in front of her. Of course you have to know that being confident is different from being overbearing. With a little practice on how to say things in front of her, you will eventually have the guts to ask a lady to go out on a date with you.

Timing.

One thing that you should take into consideration when asking a lady to go out on a date with you is good timing. If she is not in a good mood, it is best to postpone your invitation and wait for a good timing when she is in a good mood. Saying the right things at the right time is more likely to give you a positive response.

Privacy.

When asking a woman to go out with you on a date, it is best to ask her in private. Do not ask her in front of her friends to save her and yourself from teasing or humiliation. It will also put her on the spot and she may feel pressured to decide at once. Never pressure anyone to go out on a date with you. Asking her on a date in private, with just the two of you is more personal and sincere. There is a high chance that she will be pleased and appreciate your good gesture.

Know why you are asking her out.

Before asking a woman to go out with you on a date, you should know why you are asking her on a date because it is easier to convey what you want to tell her if you know why you are doing this. In case she asked you why you are inviting her, you know how to answer her questions. Be sure to express your reasons why you are asking her out in a way that she will feel good. As mentioned earlier, a little practice on how to say your lines on asking a lady to go out on a date with you can be very helpful. Practice in front of a mirror or if you have a close female friend, practice saying your lines to her.

Be ready with your plans.

Of course you have to be prepared with your plans on your first date in case she asked. It would be a big turn off if she asked you about your plans on your first date and you will go blank or unable to give her the details. Do your homework, plan ahead and be prepared. It is best to know something about her before making plans on where to take her on your first date. Ask mutual friends about her interests and hobbies so that you can plan something that she likes to do.

Prepare yourself just in case she says “no’, be mature about it, accept the answer with grace and do not feel bad about her. It is not the end of the world even if you were rejected after asking a woman to go out with you on a date. It just means you have to apply the law of statistics...

Ask X single women out, multiple by the percentage who found you attractive/cute/funny/interesting = the number of women who say yes.

So if 10% of women find you attractive/cute/funny/interesting, then it stands to reason that if you ask out 20 women that 18 of them will say no... but two of them will say yes!!!

So even if the percentage is really low (like 2%) if you ask out enough women some of them will say yes.

What to Wear on your First Date

People always like to be fashionable and appealing when first meeting someone new - which these days means you probably met them through online personals.

Dressing makes a you attractive or breaks you. Mostly during your Date, Improper dressing while meeting your date will surely break your future opportunities. You will always be in a dilemma on what dress you would like to wear for our First Date.

Lot of times you might have ran into problem with your date because you are over dressed. This is because you did not know what to wear for which venue. Yes, First Date Venue is one of the most critical factors that decide what to wear for your first Date. Let me walk-through on how you need to be dressed during your First date

Dinner Date

Most of us go for Dinner date with our beloved. Your dressing should depend on type of meal, whether lunch or dinner and the restaurant. You cannot wear casuals for a nice classy restaurant. You need to be dressed with a nice and clean suit. However if you are going for a fast food restaurant, you cannot be in a suit which will show you as over dressed. This will kill your date because no one likes your opposite to be overdressed.

Now let’s think about nice decent restaurant where we mostly schedule our first date. Wear a elegant shoes with a classy pants with a matching shirt. During your date Women tend to get first impression about their man by looking at their shoes. So make sure you have a nice pair of shoes.Keep it simple but classy. A classy shoe with clean pant with matching shirt is generally a safe choice for a Date.

Movie Date

If you had planned to go for a movie date, we men tend to over dress, this may be we are surrounded by a huge amount of women that go to movies, but remember you are already with someone, so there is no point to get over dressed just to impress other ladies. If you are a jeans, t-shirt guy, that is all you require for your first date. You can also wear a causal shirt and a matching pant is more acceptable. If you overdress for a movie, then there is a high expectation set in next dates. To see how much fashionable you are, a movie date will be best. So be honest in your clothing.

Night Club Date

If you want to have an unconventional first date, try out a Night club or a bar. It is an easy to choose a dress and it is unconventional place for the first date. Try to choose a trendy outfit or a nice suit that will impress your date. If you had planned to go to a bar, then you should avoid wearing awkward suits, just go in a casual shirt and jeans.

These are general ways of having great date and general guidelines on how can we be aware of certain fashion mistakes we do in first date. But everyone is different and they follow their won guidelines so be prepared for a successful first date.